Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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