I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize