i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize