i jhust puked up my retainher.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
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