READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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