Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize