my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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