It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
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Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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