I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize