Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize