I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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