it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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