My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Someone stole a lamp last night.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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