Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Randomize