uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
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I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
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I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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