wake up i wanna do it froggy style
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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