I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize