Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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