What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
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You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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