Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
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