do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
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