i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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