I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize