can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize