Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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