I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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