at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
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