Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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