hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize