I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize