its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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