HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I currently don't understand fingers.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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