she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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