I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
she woke up with a sticky ear
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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