2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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