i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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