I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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