dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm sobbing to NWA
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize