i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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