I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize