She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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