ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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