I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
My ATM looks so different sober.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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