it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
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First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
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I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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