Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize