i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
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he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
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Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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