Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
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He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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