There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize