This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize