do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Randomize